Osama’s Children Pose Threat

It will be reported in The News Of The World next month thanks to historic phone taps that world governments are on the hunt for several of Osama Bin Laden’s kids who were fathered by him while he was on the run, which says something for the security services – wasn’t even caught when his trousers were down.

The children are said to pose an enormous risk to the entire world and security services from the MI5 to the CIA are requesting that the world’s children join in and build their own forces immediately to counter any threat by the offspring who are thought to be aged, five, six, nine and twelve.

Governments are pleading with their nation’s children to be vigilant and to stock up on artillery and machinery. The children are thought to command eight regiments on each continent consisting of tanks, planes, infantry and chemical weapons such as paints and an army of Blobimals. The following items have been recommended and are available at your local armoury and online at the recommended retail price.

France are requesting their school children buy Squadrons of the brand new V-Jet Full Tilt with Belgium and Holland also placing orders.




The Russians have embarked on a more sophisticated plan and recruiting million of children into their spy programme and are issuing the Mr I Spy Digital Camera Binoculars to watch their borders.



The United Kingdom and Ireland have opted for the Gyro Tandem Remote Control Helicopter with such windy weather all year round this Helicopter will be untouchable if the Osamas use a fatal whoopie cushion.



The United States of America are requesting millions of Remote Controlled Air Racer for rapid response across all of North America, with Canadians keen to be on the look out too. All nations children are buying these armaments to defend themselves against the new Osama threat.


Don’t delay, ensure the safety of your families and protect yourselves!! It was recently reported that Osama fathered four children while on the run as the World’s number one terrorist, must’ve been a slow news day…

Enthusiastic, opinionated and dry humoured internet vagabond.